Networking is a myth and speed networking is an oxymoron. Traditional networking is face-to-face advertising which can be extremely annoying. What does anyone want from networking meetings? To develop contacts that matter. However, the current networking process is broken and will never meet our expectations.
Instead, we need to Un-Network. We should focus on relationship building, not card flipping. We need to stop trying so hard to “network.” It was a dark day when business people started using the word network as a verb. Un-Networking, or the act of letting a productive network happen as the result of natural relationship building, is the foundation of American business. Un-Networking works indirectly. The average person cannot walk up to Donald Trump, shake his hand, and say, “Hi Mr. Trump. My name is John Smith and I want to network with you.”
In order to break yourself of the networking compulsion, you must find the right people, in the right place, with the right process, and adhere to the right philosophy. This new model is called Un-Networking. It contains 11 Essential Elements.
1. Forbid Direct Selling
Relationship building cannot occur if everyone is overtly or covertly selling. This virtually precludes the building of trust. Without trust, referrals are simply card flipping. Sure, there are lots of names for followup. If someone is bored and needs some work to do, this is fine. However, most business people are looking for meaningful leads, not busywork. The simplest way to build trust is to be in front of the right people and to stop direct selling. This may seem counterintuitive. Businesses selling to other businesses (B2B) tend to be long-term relationship sales. A strong relationship is a prerequisite to the sale. The best way to sell more products is in an environment that forbids direct selling.
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